Monday, April 30, 2007

The Shadows 5

Thick Inside 34 Hours

The Western Wall at 2:43 PM on June 14th.


So giddy. Which is good 'cause this is the last night of the semester that I have to stay up all night. Theres something euphoric about watching the sun set in the reflection of a window then watching it rise through the window. Every time I've done my best. I've given more. That makes me happy. I never care about a single letter.

A Quote From My Poem "Palace Of Desire"

She could slip her curved dagger
behind his esophagus and pull
from ear to ear: it was sharp enough,
and she wanted to watch him expire.

Sunday, April 29, 2007

Mary Welsh Hemingway

After years of a physically, emotionally, and verbally abusive relationship, when Mary read the manuscript for The Old Man and the Sea, all she said was,

"I forgive you for every rotten thing you've ever done."

This book gets me every time.

Saturday, April 28, 2007

Spring Music Post 3

Listen to Lovedrug.

I've heard them described as the first indie-rock band in the last few years that doesn't want to sound like Green Day.

My and Lovedrug have a past. Members of Lovedrug used to be in The Kerith Ravine. I loved Kerith. When I heard they split up I was excited that two members formed Lovedrug. Then I downloaded their first songs about a year after the split, and fell for them. Lovedrug just writes music that sounds right to me.

Their "The Rocknroll EP," was awesome. They seemed to be going in the direction of melding folk, rock, and emo. "Goodbye Blue Fly" is such a good song but didn't make it onto their first LP. I didn't like the song Rocknroll.

Their first LP, "Pretend You're Alive," opened with the stunning and tight "In Red," then the breathtaking "Blackout." Their music was tight, and very much rock. As always, Michael Shepard's vocals sounded dreamy and unrestrained - a great contrast with the music. The rest of the album ended up a bit too emo for me but I found myself playing it over and over and over and over again. I probably listened to this CD straight for about a week. I fell for it. But I still just didn't like the song Rocknroll.

Their newest CD, "Everything Starts Where It Ends," is spectacular. Truly. I just got it yesterday and I can't believe it. They are much more experimental this time around: listen to "Salt of the Earth" and you will understand, they also use vocal modulators on one track in a way that reminds me of The Mars Volta - but the bands are NOTHING alike otherwise. They are still folksy and rocky and a bit emo, but their song-writing has become much more skilled and complex. These are amazing songs.

Friday, April 27, 2007

I Am Going With This:

I am finally happy with the roof.

Now for a break before I put on materials.

Tuesday at Midnight

Open Letter To Louise Glück

Thank you.


What I Just Learned But Should've Known

Josh Ritter is from Moscow.

Thursday, April 26, 2007


President and Prime Minister and Military Commander in Chief Umar Hassan Ahmad al-Bashir denies any involvement with the Janjaweed and genocide in Darfur. This is like Idaho and Washington attacking Oregon with weapons and commanders and bombers from DC and the President denying any involvement. Now Bashir is holding 100,000 tonnes of sorghum and some peas meant for Darfur, saying they need to test for genetic manipulations. There is no such thing as genetically manipulated sorghum.

Article Here.

Also, the Sudanese air force, which has regularly bombed villages in the region since 2003 despite numerous no-fly treaties, has now painted their planes white. White is the color of the UN relief planes. Imaging seeing a white plane land, running to get food, but when you get there you are raped and beat or simply killed. Bashir is the man I would have the easiest time hating.

And Now It Begins

My building is a street market with a cafe and a Nile swimming hole in the Giza ghetto of Cairo. I'll explain how I got there later.

134 hours

and, GO!

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

The Shadows 3

This took me all morning to figure out how to do.

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Two Races In A Row!

The big car has only ever been beaten twice, two races in a row. Now, the last three races have been tight, technical street races. Audi has stated from the beginning that they designed the R10 exclusively for Le Mans, no compromises. They usually follow that up with something like, therefore we do not expect to do well on street courses or really short courses.


I always lose them at that "therefore." Le Mans is a street race. Le Mans is THE street course. Well, Le Mans and Monaco are THE street courses but Le Mans is THE street course for sports cars.

Next Race: Utah Grand Prix. I will be attending! This is a great track and a wonderful build-up to --

Next Next Race: The big one. Someday I will make it over to France to see this race. Someday. Knowing me I would stay there all night and watch all twenty-four hours of it. Knowing me I would fall asleep in the stands to the lull of the engines. I love Le Mans. But I'm sure you've noticed that.

Saturday, April 21, 2007

The Anticipated Shadows

These turned out just like I wanted them to.

The Unintended Shadow

When I saw this shadow it took my breath away.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Stories From The Night

1. On a late-night Rosauer's run for half a gallon of milk and eight cans of Monster, the grocery store was playing show tunes. There was a big bald guy in a leather jacket wandering through the store singing along at the top of his lungs. He got in line right behind me and didn't stop until he got up to the counter. Then he started again after checking out and sang while he was walking away.

2. I never thought reading about nine months of a street sweeper's life would be so entertaining and poignant. They're thinking about a movie, or a novella, or a collection of short stories. Bruiser had me hooked for an hour and a half or so. The download is here. The original is here. The original is NSFW because of replies, but I prefer it because the F word is replaced with loving or gently caress which I find hilarious. One of my favorite lines:

By the way, your friend wanted me to give you a message: "Tell him to remember this night every time he wants to dress up like a Roman soldier and put on a fireworks show." I have no idea what that means. And I don't want to know.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Posting Will Now Slow Down

And if you want to know where I will be, let me show you:

Thank you.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Shortest Hemingway Story I Have Heard

For sale. Baby booties. Never used.

Monday, April 16, 2007


The wonderful, gracious, and HOT Natasha Trethewey just won in Poetry for Native Guard. She visited Idaho late last year and came through a few classes and gave a brilliant reading. We were using NG as a textbook at the time and fell in love with her work. Congratulations to Miss Trethewey, who will probably never read this.

Audi Fell!

After winning every race it has entered - the last nine ALMS races, and the opening Seabring ALMS race in 2006, and Le Mans 2006 -
the Audi R10 has been beat.
By six LMP2 cars.

Four Porsches and two Acuras.

Finally, we know their drivers and team are not all robots. Somebody over there is possibly a human. However, this could just be the result of a glitch in programming.

Don't get me wrong, the R10 deserves all the respect in the world. It is an excellent car and that is a VAST understatement. However, for fans of racing, it is never good to see a car dominate so powerfully. It gets boring. (Now the Porsche Spyders will probably begin to dominate though.) I guess money can't buy every win.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Corbusier's Speech, 25 June 1955, Dedication Of Ronchamps

Your Excellency,

In building this chapel I wanted to create a place of silence, prayer, and inner joy. A sense of the sacred inspired our work. Some things are sacred, others are not, be they religious or not. Our workmen and Bona, the foreman, Maisonnier from my atelier at 35 Rue de Sèvres, the engineers and the quantity of surveyors, other workmen and firms, administrators and Savina were the ones who realized this difficult work, which pays careful attention to detail, and is rugged and strong in its use of materials, yet is sensitive and enlivened by the mathematics that inform the whole construction and create an indescribable space. Some scattered symbols and written text offer praise to the Virgin.

The Cross – the true cross of torment – is set up in this arch; the Christian drama has now taken possession of this locus. Your excellency, I give over to you this chapel in loyal concrete, steeped perhaps in temerity and certainly in courage, in the hope that it will find in you and in those who ascend this hill an echo of all we have inscribed in it.

Friday, April 13, 2007

ATY Is Giddy

The other day I wrote these words in big letters on a scrap of paper:


It is exciting. I am obsessing over every little detail. To have all this come so suddenly and right now. I am going to do it. I will.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Spring Music Post 2: Another Longtime Favorite Band

I discovered them through Everything is Illuminated, the movie. Then my boss couldn't help telling me how much he worshiped them. I bought a CD and wow. I can see why.

I have heard their live shows are insanity. Their scene in Everything merely touches the tip. The lead singer dresses up in costume or drag and they have dancers in the band and everybody goes absolutely crazy.


"Start Wearing Purple"

Start wearing purple wearing purple
Start wearing purple for me now
All your sanity and wits they will all vanish
I promise, it's just a matter of time...

Start wearing purple wearing purple
Start wearing purple for me now
All your sanity and wits they will all vanish
I promise, it's just a matter of time...

I've known you since you were a twenty, and I was twenty,
and thought that some years from now
a purple little little lady will be perfect
for dirty old and useless clown...

Start wearing purple wearing purple
Start wearing purple for me now
All your sanity and wits they will all vanish
I promise, it's just a matter of time...

So yeah, I know it all from Diogenes to Foucault
from Lozgechkin to Passepartout
I ja kljanus obostzav dva paltza
schto muziko poshla ot Zzukov Mu!...

Start wearing purple wearing purple
Start wearing purple for me now

Start wearing purple for me now!

All your sanity and wits they will all vanish
I promise, it's just a matter of time...

So Vio-Vio-Violetta! Etta! Va-va-va-vaja dama ti moja!
Eh podayte nam karetu, votetu, i mi poedem k ebenjam!

So yeah, ah start wearing purple wearing purple
Start wearing purple for me now
All your sanity and wits, they will all vanish
I promise, it's just a matter of time!...

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

New From The Used

Starting From San Francisco
Lawrence Ferlinghetti

The Complete Poems
Anne Sexton

I love how many used bookstores Moscow/Pullman has. For such a small community, 60,000 during the school year, Moscow has three that I know of and Pullman has two.

LA Times Pulls Head Out Of Ass II

The Tragedy of Tiero and Marena
March 31st, 2007

“They just rode into these two towns and shot everything in sight.”
“An eight year old boy said bullets fell ‘like rainfall.’”
“This was an unusually brutal attack.”
“Complete desolation and destruction. And the stench, my God, the stench.”
“The simple analysis of black versus Arab doesn't hold here.”

The deadliest attack to hit southeastern Chad in eighteen months leaves over two hundred dead. Further proof that one bad apple ruins a barrel: the growing violence in the region has been seen as caused by the tension in Darfur. A team of humanitarian aid workers that reached the villages on Sunday found mass graves, decomposing bodies, scores of dead livestock and hundreds of torched huts, some still smoldering more than a week after.

Article here.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

She Takes

I got home from school and found a full plate uneaten in the microwave. She still wont let me sleep or do homework. She's dead. She shouldn't be able to do this to me.

Ars Poetic

I want to say words that flame
as I say them, but I keep quiet and don't try
to make both worlds fit into one mouthful.

I keep secret in myself, an Egypt
that doesn't exist.
Is that good or bad? I don't know.


look at these photos

Juan Gris: Bottle and Glass on a Table

I've heard it said he was painting this:

Monday, April 09, 2007

The Heliopolis Ennead Through The Fifth Dynasty

Photograph of the Obelisk at Heliopolis by Zbigniew Kosc.

In the beginning Atum begat himself. He was a hermaphrodite, but almost always depicted and referred to as a he. He rose from Nu atop a benben, a mound of earth, of which only the topmost hill showed above the primordial water. Atum resided near the acacia tree of life. The oldest acacia tree, just north of Heliopolis, was therefore considered the birthplace of the gods. Being bored, he masturbated and swallowed his own semen, thus creating Shu, god of the air, and Tefnut, goddess of moistness – water and fertility. (This is why Ayurvedic medicine sees the babul, bark, of the acacia as a treatment for premature ejaculation.) Shu and Tefnut then created Geb, god of the earth, and Nut, goddess of sky. Geb and Nut originally engaged in continuous copulation before their father Shu separated them. They begat Osiris, Isis, Set, and Nepthys.

Osiris: the god of the underworld and death. Married to Isis. Sterile because he is the god of death.

Isis: the goddess of the underworld, magic, and life/birth. She is the deification of the wife of Pharaoh.

Set: god of the desert and hence storms, strength and lower Egypt. Married to Nepthys. Sterile because he is the god of the desert.

Nepthys – a complex goddess to say the least: goddess of mortuary rites, known for providing divine assistance and being a ferocious protector and a nursing mother. She is linked with the Sacred Bennu Bird, the Phoenix. She is youthful and beautiful herself, though her sister Isis is the goddess of youth. She is an obstacle the Pharaoh must overcome to attain life in the afterlife.

Later, at the end of the Old Kingdom (2134 BC), Shu and Tefnet argued and Tefnet left Egypt for Nubia. Shu missed her but she changed herself into a lioness and killed anyone who got close. Thus she became the goddess of war and the flood lands of the Nile shrunk.

She did not return until the Ogdoad beliefs were integrated into the Ennead, allowing Thoth to disguise himself and convince her to return. Also created by the melding of Ogdoad and Ennead is the Myth-Cycle of Osiris, Isis, Horus, and Set.

Thoth: judge or mediating power. Created science and writing. Established the 365 day calendar by gambling Khonsu, the moon, and winning 1/72nd of her power to add five days, 1/72nd of 360, to the calendar year. Later became associated with magic.

Also later: Set became associated with evil after the Second Intermediate Period because the Hyksos, foreign rulers, picked him as their patron deity.

A pyramidion, the top stone of a pyramid and also a funerary marker like a tombstone, was called a benbenet, symbolizing the arising of life through death and the passage into the afterlife. Obelisks are also representations of the benben.

If you cannot tell, Egyptian Ennead mythology and folklore is about reconciling opposites.

Sunday, April 08, 2007

Seattle Got Sun For Easter

I got the first butterfly of the season. Not this one:

Photograph by chuchogm.

Two best Easter Services ever:

1. Notre Dame Cathedral, Paris: unfortunately there were so many people. Stood in line to get in. It was just nice to be in that building at that time and hear that music. I loved it.

2. Interfaith Sunrise Service at the Grand Canyon, Arizona: It was so beautiful and so cold I do not think I heard a word that was said though. I was too distracted by this:

This Morning I am listening to Symphony 9 and doing homework. I love Dvořák. The homework I'm not too sure about. Something about the outdoors always makes me feel more reverential than being inside ever could. It is what I will not write. What I cannot. It is mine and I will never ever ever share. Even if you were there, I still wont rehash it.

Saturday, April 07, 2007

I Am Exhausted

from a woman who has been dead four thousand five hundred and ten years exactly. I can't do anything else. She takes ALL my time. I love it. I hate it. I need it. I am obsessed.

Friday, April 06, 2007

My Favorite Merle Song

"Ramblin' Fever"
Merle Haggard

My hat don't hang on the same nail too long.
My ears can't stand to hear the same old song.
An' I don't leave the highway long enough,
To bog down in the mud.
'Cos I've got ramblin' fever in my blood.

Caught this ramblin' fever long ago,
When I first heard a lonesome whistle blow.
If someone said I ever gave a damn,
Man, they damn sure told you wrong.
I've had ramblin' fever all along.

There's times I'd like to bed down on a sofa,
And let some pretty lady rub my back.
And spend the early morning drinking coffee,
Talkin' about when I'll be coming back.

But I don't let no no woman tie me down,
And I never get too old to get around.
I wanna die along the highway and rot away,
Like some old high-line pole,
Rest this ramblin' fever in the soul.

Ramblin' fever,
The kind that can't be measured by degrees.
Ramblin' fever,
There ain't no kind of cure for my disease.


Happy Birthday Merle.
Seventy years is a long time to be wandering.

Thursday, April 05, 2007

What The Mailwoman Gave Me Today:

The First Four Books of Poems
by Louise Glück

As you have probably guessed, one of my favorite poets. I love her work. The book has soft paper, very soft. There is an untitled Seeley on the front and a dark burgundy color on the back. It looks very serious. The font is interesting, but I'm not sure I like it. There is no colophon unfortunately, so I can't tell for sure what it is. There are two hundred and twelve pages of poems. This makes me happy. I can't stop touching the paper, rubbing my hands on it.


What's Written on the Body
by Peter Pereira

The cover is very nice: I like the idea that poems are what exist in the small of your back. The type here is perfect: Minion and Avenir with some Arial, bold apparently. I love the fonts. They work perfectly for me. Arial is an immensely underrated font for literary texts like Peter's last book and all of this one that I have read or heard. Peter is really a damn fine poet. I am very excited to finish it. The paper is thicker than Glück's, which is nice because I don't feel like I'm going to tear the page. But I like the soft paper a lot. If you haven't heard Peter read yet, do it. Jared Leising put on a reading with Rebecca and Peter the day Thompson died. That was the day I decided I liked poetry and wanted to do this poetry thing. My girlfriend is utterly in love with Peter's work and stole Saying the World from me for months. I told her if she didn't give it back she couldn't borrow this one. I got it back the next day.


The Cairo Trilogy: Palace Walk, Palace of Desire, Sugar Street
by Naguib Mahfouz

I love his work. This borders on worship. Nader Nazemi introduced him to me and I will forever hold Nazemi in high regard for that. This book is stocky. It is thick and the cover is smaller than both the other books. The dust-jacket features an awesome photograph by Chris Steele-Perkins with a faint, lined texture. I don't like this paper though: it is too thin without feeling soft like Glück's. The colophon is perfect: "This book is set in BEMBO which was cut by the punch-cutter Francesco Griffo for the Venetian printer-publisher Aldus Manutius in early 1495 and first used in a pamphlet by a young scholar named Pietro Bembo." I always check the colophon first. I love reading a colophon like that. Unfortunately, Bembo seems a little thin to me. But the book features a built-in, cloth book-mark like a Bible one. I love that. Regardless of my relationship with Bembo, I am excited to no end over this book. I can't wait till summer so I can get started on these thirteen hundred and thirteen pages of Mahfouz goodness.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Open Letter To Microsoft

Why, when I type in Heliopolis, do you suggest I meant Mediapolis? Heliopolis is the ancient center of learning where the Obelisk in Central Park, and Cleopatra's Needle in London come from. Heliopolis is the place where humanity started according to Egyptian mythology. Ptolemy, Herodotus, Strabo, Diodorus, Arrian, Aelian, Plutarch, Diogenes Laertius, Josephus, Cicero, Pliny the Elder, Tacitus, Pomponius Mela, and Stephanus of Byzantium all visited and described it. It is the formidable, direct predecessor of Alexandria. And what is Mediapolis? A town of 1664 people in Iowa that doesn't even have a railroad. Thank you Microsoft, for your vast knowledge: of course I meant Mediapolis rather than Heliopolis.


Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Spring Music Post 1: Favorite Song Lyrics Of The Week

Also favorite band of the week.

"The Past Is A Grotesque Animal"
Of Montreal

the past is a grotesque animal
and in its eyes you see
how completely wrong you can be

the sun is out
it melts the snow that fell yesterday
makes you wonder
why it bothered
i fell in love
with the first cute girl that i met
who could appreciate Georges Bataille
standing at a Swedish festival
discussing "story of the eye"


i'm flunking out, i'm flunking out
i'm gone, i'm just gone
but at least i author my own disaster
at least i author my own disaster
performance breakdown
and i don't wanna hear it
i'm just not available

things could be different
but they're not
things could be different
but they're not

the mousey girl screams "violence, violence!"
the mousey girl screams "violence, violence!"
she gets hysterical
cause they're both so mean
and it's my favorite scene
the cruelty's so predictable
makes you sad on the stage
though our love project has so much potential
but it's like we weren't made for this world
though i wouldn't really wanna meet someone who was

do i have to scream in your face?
i've been dodging lamps and vegetables
throw it all in my face
i don't care-
let's just have some fun
let's tear the shit apart
let's tear the fucking house apart
let's tear our fucking bodies apart,
let's just have some fun

somehow you've red-rovered
the Gestapo circling my heart
and nothing can defeat you
no death, no ugly world
you've lived so brightly
you've altered everything


i fed the unraveler
the paw hellion
but even apocalypse is fleeting
there's no death, no ugly world
sometimes i wonder if you're mythologizing me
like i do you
apologizing me like i do you

we want our film to be beautiful
not realistic
see me in the radiance of terror dreams
you can betray me
you can, you can betray me
teach me something wonderful
crown my head crown my head
with your lilting effects
project your fears onto me
i need to view them,
see there's nothing to them
i promise you there's nothing to them


i've explored you with the detachment
of an analyst
but most nights
we've raided the same kingdoms
and none of our secrets are physical
none of our secrets, are physical
none of our secrets, are physical now

Monday, April 02, 2007

Made Me Laugh Today

The above is called "Game Over."

Hamster Fighting Machine! Click to read every little bit of text. Be as sick as I am.

First Presbyterian Church: Moscow, Idaho

Rear picture by me.

And the architecture student reels
from the information, trying
to make sense of the building.
He can't yet but he will.
Sketching always helps him with that.
He knows it.
He knows it.
He is sure of nothing.